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  • Writer's pictureSusie Csorsz Brown

According to Violet

My mom had many many excellent qualities. She was stubborn as a mule, she could play martyr like the best of them, and she was a champion grudge holder. She would never ever ever admit to pain. She did not complain. She did not share personal thoughts or feelings easily. She was also generous and giving and would literally bend over backward to do anything for the people she loved most. She was very family-oriented, and loved her children and grandchildren completely. She had a sense of adventure met only by a stubbornness to spend no money. Luckily, she would join us wherever we wandered so we always included her.

There are the things we grow up just knowing because we hear them over and over and over. Truisms. My mom had a few. Some of my favorites below.

  1. Never give a container back empty. If it once contained food, make/find/buy something edible to give back in it. If it can contain a flower, add it. Give it back promptly and say a heart-felt thank you.

  2. Be who you are, don't make excuses or apologize. Your best self is the best you can do, and it is good enough for all things and all people. Never think that who you are is less than; 100% of the time anyone who has that opinion is not worth your time any way.

  3. Live well. Find your routine that works for her anywhere, anyhow. My mom stuck with her routine no matter what -- perhaps a bit mulishly.

  4. It is never too cold, too rainy or too snowy for a walk. Try at least a short one, and probably you'll get farther than you imagine. And, if it is really that unpleasant, you can always turn around and head back, but that will at least get you a bit of fresh air.

  5. Do what you HAVE to do first, then you have plenty of time for what you WANT to do. The HAVE to's come first.

Thanks, Mom, for all the advice. I love you.

Bet your mom offered you all sorts of advice. Please share; I'd love to hear it.

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