Advice (mostly good) to consider
A few of the blogs I follow do a yearly ‘what I have learned this far’ birthday wrap-up sort of a post. I’ll follow their example. Parenting, wellness, life... it’s all in there. This is from me, but none of this is unique and ground-breaking. Nonetheless, it can be good to hear these pieces of advice; these are all random snippets to remember.
Life is too short to worry about the little things; focus on what is important (or helps to support those important things).
Genuine friendships are the glue of life. Your friends are those that will be with you all night if you need your hand held, will tell you if you have spinach in your teeth, and will lend you that perfect dress (even if they might need it) because you have a thing you have to attend. You can’t afford not to have at least one or two genuine friends in life.
I’m not exactly a fan of selfies — the moment happened even if you didn’t document it — but If you have to take a selfie with others, make sure to take enough that everyone in it with you, looks good.
No age is a ‘bad’ age unless you think it is. Perhaps you should change your mind about what is ‘bad’ and be happy with who and how old you are.
There is no reason to be a mean girl (or boy). Women (and men) should be nicer to one another. Be supportive. Period.
Don’t worry about what anyone else is thinking. Focus on your positive thoughts; you’ve got this! Your hair, your clothes, your surface … doesn’t matter. Every single one of those things can change. Your inside? That is what matters, and nothing anyone else is thinking about it is relevant.
You have a story to tell so share it proudly and appropriately.
Being ‘busy’ is not a skill nor an achievement. Being busy is a state of mind. Let’s not glorify being busy.
I once read that women use significantly more exclamation points than men do. I would say it’s a good thing to have things we are excited about and want to share. I think it’s a good thing to be excited or emotional. Embrace your exclamation points.
One can never have too many friends. Treat people like they are (or you want them to be) your friend: be honest, forth-coming, kind, and respectful. Smile.
On your birthday, absolutely let’s celebrate you. Let’s also celebrate your mom; she is the one that did the work.
At the end of the day, not one person is going to remember what you wore, what size you are or what your hair looked like. Not one person is going to remember the color of phone case or your brand of whatever. They are, though, going to remember how you treated them and your behavior.
You are important. You are not, however, more important than everyone else. Nor are you too important to clean up after yourself (literally and figuratively).
There is not enough time to worry about what others think of you, of your opinion, of your clothing choices. Worry about being the most genuine ‘you’ possible, and that is the most anyone can ask. Go ahead and wear that bikini. The only one it impacts is you.
Your children are amazing, confusing, erratic, and irrational. They are also individuals on their own. Don't share their accomplishments/pictures/etc unless they are okay with it.
Tell your friends that they are important to you, and that you love them. They are the family that you create for yourself. Tell your family that they are important to you, and that you love them. They are the family you are lucky enough to be born with.
The way I embrace wellness works for me. It might not work for everyone. Embrace wellness as it works best for you. No judging, especially if you are doing your best.
Every so often (but at least every year) ask yourself “Just who do you think you are?” in a very non-rhetorical way. The answer is important. The answer will not be the same each time, either, which is why it is important to keep doing it.
It’s okay to say “I don’t know.” Follow up with finding the answer. It's amazing to learn new things.
Learn how to apologize sincerely. I wish it were that you will not need this skill, but …. You will.
Never return a (food) container empty.
If it hurts, if it pinches, if it is not comfortable, then don’t wear it.
No one keeps secrets. Remember this when you’re telling people all your business.
Life is not fair. That fact is profoundly frustrating and completely indisputable.
Sometimes it’s not fate, or a sign. Sometimes it is just a coincidence.
It's not a 'cheat day'. Satisfy your cravings with high quality foods that will 'scratch that itch' and savor every bite. Want a crunchy taco? Absolutely, but eat one with freshly-made beans, your favorite sharp cheddar and quality chicken. Want some chocolate? Enjoy a bar of dark chocolate without a bunch of weird (non-pronouncable) mix-ins. Enjoy every bite, and then it feels like nourishment and not a ‘cheat.’ Humans are omnivores; eat and enjoy all (high quality) things.
Learn how to make really really great cookies. Or a damn good bar dessert. Baking is my go-to. It's my happy thing, my stressed thing, my I-need-to-take-something thing. There is something hugely therapeutic about taking a bunch of ingredients, mixing them together and creating something tasty you can share.
Over-tip. I was a waitress and a bar tender once. I worked my tail off. Be kind to that person bringing you food and drink, and they will be kind to you.
Be you. Be the best you you can be. Not one person can ask for more.